Shower Invitees and Not Wedding…

 

Donnie:
My boss is getting married and she has a planner from Stanley Korshak, and you know if it isn’t in the “blue book” it just isn’t appropriate…  so anyway…  my question is this, she has a limited budget and is only inviting a small number of people to the wedding.  A large cocktail party is being thrown for the couple and she asked if she could invite some that are not on the wedding invite list.  Now, I know it is NOT proper to invite someone to a shower and not the wedding – but, this cocktail party?  This is her 2nd marriage and his 1st.  What is the official W. Donnie Brown stand on this issue?

Thanks,

Heather

Heather:
I hear this all the time.  My opinion is that she should invite anyone and everyone to the cocktail party.  She can call it an engagement party if she wants.  At the event, she should mention that they are having a small, intimate family wedding and would not be able to invite everyone that they love and care about and maintain the integrity of the event they hope to have. Therefore, they have been invited to this event so they would not be left out.  It is the politically correct way to do it.  Then, she should tell the few friends that are being invited that it is on the down low and ask for discretion.

I hope this helps!
Donnie